My plan does involve tests, trials and triumphs!

This year i was in year 12... im not gonna say it was easy but it definatly did test me. This year for me held a lot of tears, tantrums, high expectations and future choices to make.

constantly throughout the year i felt pressured and burdened by expectations of my family, friends and teachers to do well in school. i felt like i had to live up to their standards and that pressure of achieveing what they thought i was capable of was at times overwhelming. There were times when i didnt put my best efforts in and felt overwhelmed and like i didnt care and looking back now i regret not making best use of the time, resources and friends i had to help me achieve better. Having said that there were also times when i put 110% of effort in and was highly disappointed with the outcome.

This is generally how i feel about my whole year. sure there were times when i felt i couldnt do it and didnt try but overall i think i work pretty hard in the hope to get a decent score. i know people say it doesnt matter what score u get after year 12 and that heaps true but right now its like what my entire schooling is adding up to and i dont like it. im not proud and i dont wanna advertise it or tll my family and friends little lone people that ask.

i guess i found this year so hard mentally as well because it is an ending of something which has been routine for so long and you are entering something which is so different to what was expected.

i ended the year with a 57.6 ATAR or TER score which was below my aim of 70. i was devo that i didnt get what i needed to get into my uni course and even got angry with God because i had felt so called in that direction and now it was all going wrong and i thought i knew where iwas being lead but now i dont see it.

After the inicial deverstation i chatted with a few of my wiser friends adn leaders and they reassured me that all would e ok...easy for them to say it wasnt their life which was over and a year of thier life wasted right... but... Truely they encouraged me to pray... pray for peace within myself and for a clear direction. God used those moments in prayer to whisper...
I will lead, you just need to follow

Trust... it was all about Trust. God wants me to trust him completely and follow him without heistation. coz the honest truth is... i dont know everything and i cant do things on my own. i need Gods strength to get me through and that is what ive learnt.

Since that prayer where i asked for clear guidence ive found out a few things.
firstly. i got 8 points bonus with Uni SA which should get me into my second preference uni course.
Secondly. I talked to an awesome friend and woman of God at church who is doing some awesome stuff in the foster system and with kids in care which is what i really wanna get into when ive finished uni and she told me that the government agencies are now employing people with the social work degree rather then the social science degree.
Thirdly. Guess which course i will get into??? social Work. the course which will now get me where i wanna be in the future!!!


So God really does have a plan for me and my life in fact wasnt over, it was just a test and set back to infact show me and teach me to trust and follow rather then to try and lead in my own strength!!!!

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